Schedule Now Long Distance: Signs When To Break Up If you come to the conclusion that a long-distance relationship and the intentionality necessary to maintain it is not right for you, but still want to maintain your relationship with your partner, it may be worth exploring if you or your partner relocating to either live together, or even just in the same city, is a feasible option. In a long-distance relationship, it often takes more planning and forethought to show these small gestures of love, which means that it’s easier for them to fall to the wayside. When you live with or in the same city as your significant other, it’s relatively easy to share little moments that build your connection, such as doing small acts of service for each other or holding hands as you talk about your day. One reason for this is that being in a long-distance relationship requires more intentionality to help each partner feel loved and cherished. While there are couples who are able to have healthy and happy long-distance relationships, not being able to consistently share physical space with your partner can be a legitimate challenge. There are lots of valid reasons why partners might choose to end a relationship, and when it comes to couples who are long-distance, physical separation also often plays a role. What If You Can’t Make A Long-Distance Relationship Work? However, if being long-distance is a standard part of your relationship, the problems that come along deserve serious consideration as you decide whether to continue in the relationship.
When clients ask me this question in our work together, they’re often assuming that if the relationship is all good when they’re together and it’s really just the distance that’s causing difficulties, they can discount the problems caused by physical separation as somehow less real. In thinking about your relationship’s challenging areas, what are those areas like when you are physically together?Ī final point about this common question: If your relationship is likely to remain long-distance for months or years to come, differentiating between problems caused by the distance and problems caused by the relationship may not matter all that much.Have you been physically together when real-life stressors are present? (Or in other words, not just on vacation?).Have you been physically together for extended periods of time before?.What is your relationship like when you are physically together?.Here are a few of the questions that I usually walk through as I help my clients determine an answer to whether their challenges are being caused by being long distance or by deeper issues within the relationship: 4 Questions to Ask Yourself When Your Long Distance Relationship is in Trouble In these kinds of situations, I recommend that couples work with an experienced couples therapist or relationship coach who can help them determine the root cause of their challenges and give them tools to help address them.
For example, I often meet with couples who experience some communication difficulties when they’re together that then are exacerbated into something larger when they are long distance. In my experience, the answer to this question is most often that the challenges at hand are from a combination of the two. When working with couples or individuals who are going through a hard time in their long-distance relationship, one of the most common questions I receive is whether the problems they are experiencing are just being caused by the distance or whether it’s the relationship itself that isn’t working. …eing in a long-distance relationship requires more intentionality to help each partner feel loved and cherished. What’s The Real Problem–the Relationship Or The Distance?
A long-distance breakup comes with its own trials and tribulations that fall outside the realm of ‘standard’ relationships, and I am here to talk about just that.
#Taking a break in a long distance relationship how to#
However, today, I want to talk about a side of long-distance relationships that usually gets less attention–how to know when it’s time to let go, and how to move on once you’ve made that decision. Lots of great articles and podcasts exist for people in long-distance relationships about how to improve their relationships or maintain their connections. Long-distance relationships are more popular than ever these days, especially as more and more people are finding love through apps or websites that expand their pool of potential partners beyond their own towns and cities.ĭivorce counseling for breakup recovery is a great option, like many of our Denver therapists would tell you, but let’s talk about the period before that final stage of ending a long-distance relationship. As a couples therapist and relationship coach who provides services online, I frequently work with couples who find themselves in long-distance relationships.
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